Debi, our new administrative assistant, was delegated
the undesirable task of reorganizing thousands
of reams of paper—8 1/2” x 11”, 11” x 17”, legal size. Obviously,
she was spending all her time alone in the basement storeroom.
But one day, she simply vanished, to our shock and bewilderment.
At first we assumed that she had quit in a rage, until her husband, Adam,
informed us she had never come home. There was a lengthy investigation,
but there was no trace of her, no evidence she ever left the basement.
Four months later, she reappeared in the storeroom, wearing the same summer frock,
seemingly unaware that time had passed and returned to counting paper stacks.
Debi, it seems, had found a portal to another dimension,
where time and space were warped.
She claims to have no memory of that other world, sadly.
Says that her dreams are filled with confusing images and sounds,
struggles to describe a universe that cannot be perceived by our senses.
Ultimately, she’s grateful to have returned unharmed.
The only thing that really upset her, though,
was that we only waited a week
and a half to hire a replacement administrative assistant.