1) Wake up.
2) Check your cell phone for new notifications.
3) Play a few rounds of Yahtzee on the officially licensed app. Make disappointing choices.
4) Note that you are hungry.
5) Take a nap.
6) Wake up.
7) Think about making scrambled eggs.
8) Let the dog out.
9) Let the dog back in.
10) Play more Yahtzee. Win a game. Feel three seconds of satisfaction.
11) Remember that there is nothing easier or quicker than making scrambled eggs.
12) Look up the ending to a horror movie you’re curious about but have no intention of actually watching.
13) Chat briefly with a friend on Facebook Messenger.
14) Pretend that you’ve watched a video your friend has sent you.
15) Think about taking a shower. You’ll definitely feel better if you take a shower.
16) Remember that you have to pay some bills today online. You haven’t balanced your checkbook in three months. This train of thought is exhausting.
17) Take a nap.
18) You’re definitely hungry now. Scroll through Twitter for latest political outrage.
19) Isn’t it closer to lunch now, really?
20) Make and consume peanut butter and jelly sandwich.